On Boundaries

Today we’re exploring self love and boundaries. You see, earlier this year, I decided I would accept a partial teaching contract at the university, so I would have more time, space, and energy to work on growing Sol + Heart – and supporting you! I’ve been contemplating this move for a few years now, and finally decided it was time.

About two weeks ago, I started getting calls from a variety of supervisors. They all asked the same question, a question I’ve heard many times before. It went something like, “Hi! We have an additional class that we’d like to offer and we’re looking for an instructor. Are you available?”

While I’m flattered they thought of me, this was an opportunity for me to make a choice. I could teach more, and receive a subsequent boost in pay, or I could decline and take the risk that Sol + Heart can grow.

Each time they asked me (and I received 4 requests from different people), I had the opportunity to reflect, be aware of my values and desires, and make a choice. In the past, I’ve said yes. I’ve wanted to be a good team player and I’ve wanted the secured income.

This time, I remembered the boundary I’d set for myself. No more than 3 classes this semester.

So, I declined. I held the boundary I’d set, and politely said, “no thanks.” It was tough, honestly, but I knew I was doing the best thing for myself at this time.

This is an example of an act of self love.

Sometimes, self love means holding a boundary.

I see self love as a mixture of softness and fierceness, and it’s an important part of living an open-hearted life. On the path to creating a more peaceful and loving world, you have to start with how you value and treat yourself.

 I’m learning that I have to set boundaries around how much I give.

I love to give my time, energy, money, and resources to help others.

And I have to have boundaries, so that I don’t over-give and exhaust myself and my resources.

How do you set boundaries in your life?

Boundary setting, as a self love practice, is about understanding how much you’re willing to give or flex, and where you’re not willing to give, and then holding your boundary.

You can do this with love and kindness to others. 

And by doing this, you’re being loving and kind to yourself.

You cannot expect someone else to hold your boundary.

You have to hold your boundary. 

I love coaching people around this topic. I can see the differences in my clients when they really tune into their own self-worth and self love and take a stand for themselves. As I’ve shared before, it’s incredible how saying “no” to one opportunity creates space and opening for another.

If you would like to explore self love more with me, please join me for Radiance: A Self Love CourseThis is an online course and group coaching offering for women I’ve developed with my friend and fellow coach, Blaze Bell, and we’re really excited about the impact this course has on our clients’ lives. We already have a fantastic group of women signed up for it, and we’d love to have you join us if you’re interested!

You can learn more and sign up by clicking HERE. 

Enrollment for the program ends Thursday, 8/31/17, so now’s the time to decide if you’d like to join us!

If you have any questions about whether the course is right for you, please reach out to me via email.

And in the meantime, here’s to loving yourself and honoring your boundaries.

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