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“I love you,” she said – and she meant it

This one’s for you, girlfriend:

“I love you.” 

When is the last time you said that…

to your body? 

It seems like such a simple statement, right? But when it comes to our bodies, it can also be loaded.

You know. You’re a savvy human…

You know you’re supposed  to love your body.

You know you’re supposed to treat her with care, to do all you can to be good to her…

And yet, sometimes you falter.

You get overly busy and start skipping your workouts.

You eat crummy food that makes you feel sluggish and bloated

You go on autopilot and don’t really slow down to listen to what your body needs…

Or maybe, you’re doing all the right stuff.

You’re eating right, you’re moving your body, getting enough rest, and yet you just can’t stop that critical voice inside you from telling you how much more you could be doing – if you really were “good enough.”

I know this, because I’ve been there. I know when I’m making wise, healthy choices for my body, and I know when I’m not. I know when I’m honoring and cherishing my body, and when my inner critic starts to go wild in telling me all the ways I could do more.

I also watched the documentary Embrace recently – an Australian film about women’s body image throughout the world, and was reminded of all the complexities involved in loving your body. In an effort to support my sisters, I coordinated a showing of the film at a movie theatre in Anchorage, Alaska, and it SOLD OUT. Nearly 200 seats were sold – and women raved about the power of the film – how much they related to the challenges associated with loving our bodies in a society that insists we must do more if we are ever to be allowed to love ourselves. (P.S. If you haven’t seen the film – it’s worth watching.)

Most of us – we get it.

We get that there are some seriously effed up ways that women have been socialized to relate to our bodies.

And still…

We need reminders to love ourselves.

We thrive in community and sisterhood to help us remember how to love ourselves and not tear ourselves down.

We benefit from coaches and guides who help us stay accountable to ourselves and our desires.

Last summer, my friend Blaze Bell (the fantastic health coach) and I co-created a 4 week online course called Radiance – focused on helping you feel connected and joyful in your body. We created the course to help you feel more connection with others, your body, and to explore the joy that comes with body love and positivity.

The course was such a success, that we decided we wanted to do it again!  We know you could benefit from a month of body love – and we can’t wait to be your body love coaches and guides.

If you want to learn more about our four week online body love course – Radiance – click HERE to get more info. Sign up by Friday, March 3 if you’d like to join us!

And in the meantime, go find a mirror – pause – and gaze at glorious YOU. No matter what you look like, what your habits have been lately, or how much more you know you could be doing – and say, “I love you” to your body – and mean it. No matter what, you are worthy of loving your body. Or, put another way: Your body is worth of loving. If it feels weird, do it anyway. And then try it again tomorrow. And the next day.

​​​​​​​Oh, and if you have any questions about the course, please email me and I’d love to chat more about it with you – and help you figure out whether it’s right for you.

An Open-Hearted 2017

Over the past few weeks, I’ve seen so many posts on social media about being “over” 2016. I understand the sentiment. Even outside of current events and beloved celebrity deaths, it seems the year was not an easy one for many of us.

As most of us tend to do at the new year, I find myself reflecting on the events of the past year, and envisioning 2017. I’ve been asking myself a variety of questions, including:

How do I want to feel in 2017?
What do I want to do in 2017?
How will I contribute in meaningful ways in 2017?

Perhaps these questions are useful for you, as well. I encourage you to be introspective and self-reflective, to think about where you’ve been and where you’re going personally and professionally in the upcoming year.

What intentions are you setting for the new year?
What are you envisioning will make your life even better this year?

In addition to whatever is already on your mind, I’d love to make a few suggestions:

  • Let’s commit to releasing negativity and cynicism, and figuring out how to let go of what has not been serving us over the past year. (Sure, where there is lightness, there is also darkness – but it’s probably not helping you much to dwell in the dark.)
  • Let’s figure out how we want to feel – and commit to our visions for a kinder, more loving future.
  • Let’s begin 2017 with open minds and hearts.

A more beautiful, peaceful world is possible if we are able to forgive ourselves our shortcomings and weaknesses, release our judgments about others, and continue to choose love.

This is the beginning of choosing to live an open-hearted life – being open to joy, open to delight, open to the things that hurt (because they are part of life, too), forgiving ourselves and others along the way, being authentic, kind, and courageous. 

Happy 2017!

 

WHOLE <3

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Hello loves,

The great challenge of working as a coach is acknowledging how much you understand about life, and how much you are still trying to figure out. 

This weekend there was a full moon in Pisces – highlighting wounds and emotions that help us see where we need to grow. I spoke with many of you who were feeling emotions in strong ways, and I was feeling them, too.

What was I feeling?

I was feeling sadness that my last romantic relationship didn’t work out.

Yesterday, I was walking around the farmer’s market, and I watched a lot of seemingly happy couples choosing what to buy for their week ahead. I recall how happy I felt to be doing the same thing, just a year ago.

I have spent the majority of my adult life as a single person. I had a long-term boyfriend until I was almost 25, and then for ten years – I was single.

At certain times, this was fun. I would occasionally go out with a guy for a couple of months, but for the most part, nothing stuck. I was on my own. I was independent, and could do whatever I wanted to do, even though I was deep down hoping for a partner.

I watched my friends meet, date, and marry their partners. I watched some of my friends meet, date, marry, and have kids. And then I watched some of my friends meet, date, marry, have kids —and divorce. Through all this, I was still single.

I tried every kind of dating scenario you can imagine. Blind dates, set ups, I went out to bars, I volunteered for causes I cared about, I tried E-Harmony, Match, OkCupid, Tinder (and a few others I can’t recall)… all in the name of finding love.

I collected a number of good stories, but not a partner.

I felt I’d tried everything one could try to “put themselves out there.”

Finally, in a very organic way, I met a fellow who I began to think would be my future husband. I really thought this was my happy ending to my long, long, seemingly never-resolved love story. We dated (and eventually moved in together) for a year and a half. I was so happy and hopeful about our relationship and what it could mean in my life.

But it didn’t work out.

So now, at 37, I find myself single again. I find myself again wishing for partnership, struck by the happy couples at the farmer’s market even just this weekend.

Partnership is what I’m longing for these days. I know it’s worth being honest and vulnerable about that, so you know where I’m coming from.

But even with this longing, I know that I am still whole.

I feel strong, and equipped with a lot of wisdom regarding what I do and do not want in my future romantic relationships. I also know I do not need a romantic relationship to live a happy, fulfilled, successful life full of love. I know how to feel loved and whole, inside or outside a romantic relationship.

One can desire romantic relationship, but approach that desire from a place of wholeness. 

So often I see people who feel incomplete, miserable, unsuccessful, broken, or incredibly frustrated because of their love lives. I see people who jump from one romantic relationship to the next, without truly giving themselves time to heal and figure out what they want. I see people re-creating patterns that lead them to feel lonely, unhappy, or embittered inside or outside their relationships. I see people desperately trying to find someone to “complete” them.

Approaching our romantic lives from a place of wholeness is incredibly valuable.

When we approach our desire from a place of wholeness, we are not looking for someone to “complete” us – we, in fact, do not need another person to make us feel “okay,” or “successful,” or anything else…

We approach romantic relationships, therefore, from a place of strength, self-awareness, and openness, and we are able to create healthy, loving, happy relationships if we want them.

It’s okay to desire a partner. It’s okay to desire romantic love.

What’s important is that you know you are whole. You are love, loved, and loving. You will be a wonderful, healthy, loving, kind partner to whomever is lucky enough to be with you now or in the future.

Do you know and trust this about yourself? Do you feel whole? 

Feeling whole isn’t always easy.

Being willing to examine one’s life in this way is not for the faint of heart.

My exploration and fascination with love is what brings me to my latest coaching offer.

I know I’m not alone. There are other people out there who have been caught in the complexities of love and the desire for feeling love – and could use support.

I have figured out how to feel whole and complete, while still being open to love. I consider this being what Brene Brown calls being “wholehearted,” the recognition that you are worthy of love and belonging – and all of the wonderful ways you can live a courageous, vulnerable, connected life. I call this Open-Hearted Love; the kind of love that you are ready and willing to give and receive, but the kind of love that you can give and receive with or without a partner in your life.

So, I am focusing on my 1-to-1 coaching for big-hearted changemakers and creatives who want to feel more wholehearted, open-hearted love, and WHOLE.

If you are in a place where you find yourself single and wishing to feel more love in your life, 1-to-1 coaching would be perfect for you.

Together, we will explore what’s going on for YOU.

1-to-1 coaching is personalized, but some of the things we could explore together are:

  •  identifying what you really want (in life + love)
  •  noticing limiting beliefs you might hold
  •  working through blocks to love you might experience
  •  feeling happier and healthier (in life + love)
  •  listening to your inner wisdom
  •  feeling more confident and courageous
  •  communicating your desires
  •  attracting more love to your life
  •  FEELING MORE LOVE

If you are interested in learning more, apply for a Spark Session here to learn more about how 1-to-1 coaching will support you to feel more love in your life, and to feel more whole.

In the meantime, know we are in this together. Wherever you find yourself in life + love, know that I am sending you so much love + strength – to know you are deserving of a beautiful life and love that lights you up.

 

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What Lights You Up?

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What lights you up?

What is the project you love so much you can get lost in it?

What is the idea you have that has so much potential, and all you need to do is give it some time and attention?

Many of us have creative dreams that we want to follow. Whether it’s a story to be written, an album to be recorded, a business idea you’re longing to begin, a cause that needs attention, a blog to be launched, or a small business you’re already growing, I bet you have something you’re hoping to do (probably outside your day job).

Some of us have started along the path already, but it’s not easy to go it alone. Most of us can use support along the way. Perhaps you wish for someone to talk to about your idea, to strategize with, to cheer you on, and to help you keep going when it gets tough.

When I look back on my creative project & business endeavor (Sol + Heart), I can see how many people have helped me along the way. Thankfully, my family and friends have encouraged and supported me. And I also made the decision, (and continue making the decision), to sign up for opportunities to help me grow. I have worked with coaches and joined several programs that have helped me learn more and receive support.

Two programs that helped me (and that I enjoyed) the most, were called “mastermind groups.” You may have never heard of a mastermind group before, but let me tell you – I have found them to be incredibly beneficial! In mastermind groups, you meet with a group of like-minded individuals working on projects (or businesses) and with them you can tackle challenges, support each other, share connections, and possibly find people to collaborate with – depending on what you’re working on. They become a special community in which you can receive coaching, advice, develop momentum, and strategize.

In my experience with masterminds, I have been challenged, encouraged, made new friends with great people, and been really inspired to stay committed to my dreams. I can look back and see how much momentum I gained through having the support of a small group and an excellent coach and teacher who could support me.

With that in mind, as I have been thinking about what I want to offer next as a part of Sol + Heart, I decided a mastermind (of sorts) was what I wanted to create next!  My latest creative project is beginning the Open-Hearted Changemakers Intensive – an online mastermind group opportunity (for those who don’t know or like the name “mastermind”). This program is one in which you will receive high-level group coaching from me, and you’ll also benefit from the collective intelligence of the other participants in the program.

Together, we’ll meet twice a month as a group, and I will encourage you to meet the other weeks with a smaller team within the group. This means, you have the potential to be receiving weekly support from a team of committed, big-hearted changemakers and creatives, who are ready to grow just like you! Given that it’s an “intensive,” this is an opportunity for those of you who are ready and committed to taking action and building your creative projects. 

I am so excited to be offering this opportunity because helping awesome people who are doing neat work in the world connect and gain momentum is what lights me up!

Join us! There are three amazing folks signed up already – and there will be space for nine people total in the group – meaning there are SIX spaces still available! If you are interested in this opportunity, check out the webpage HERE for more information and details, email me with any questions, and apply HERE!

Enrollment ends this Wednesday (8/31) – so if you’re going to apply – now is the time!

Please consider joining us, and either way – I hope you follow what lights you up.

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Creative Project Clarity Workshop

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Most of us have been there. (I know I have.) 

We have this beautiful idea, we light up when we think about it or talk about it, we know it’s the direction we want to go…

And yet, something stops us.

Sometimes we think we’re too busy, sometimes we let our “busy” get in the way… Sometimes we’re scared, and we let our fear hold us back…  Sometimes we just get overwhelmed with all of the places we could begin, and we get into analysis paralysis…

The good news is, you’re not alone.

The bad news is, if you don’t get clear and start taking actions, it may just continue to be a lovely idea (and not much more than that).

The world needs your light. We need you to be creating and expanding and sharing. There’s no other YOU out there – so if you have a creative project or a business endeavor that’s calling your name, let’s get you moving in the direction of your dreams! 

If you’re ready to get going, to not be held back by fears, and to receive a little support along the way, I want to invite you to a free workshop I’m hosting this weekend. It’s a short and sweet 45 minute Creative Project Clarity Workshop – and it’s online so you can join from anywhere.

If you’re interested – the workshop will be on Friday, August 26th at 9:30 am Alaska Standard Time (10:30 PST/1:30 EST) and Saturday, August 27th at 11 am Alaska Standard Time (12 pm PST/3 pm EST).

Message me at solandheart@gmail.com and I’ll send you the workshop attendance information!

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