This summer, I made a big courageous decision to move in with my boyfriend. I’ve been considering the opportunity for several months now, and the timing was right to go for it finally. In making this kind of (HUGE) decision in my life, for a while I was feeling a lot of uncertainty and fear. Over a few months, I was able to really listen to myself, explore what felt right, and make a choice. Now that I’m on the other side of it, and have made the decision (we’re in the process of moving now!) – I thought I would reflect on what helped me to make what feels like a very aligned decision for myself.
Here are some of the steps I used to make a big, life-changing decision:
- Feel into your body – ask yourself about the different options and see how your body responds.
- Consider your values – know what you hold dear in the world so you can make decisions based on how you want to live and what you believe.
- Listen, create space, and ask for guidance – no matter what your spiritual path, all of us benefit from listening to our intuition. Sometimes we need to take some time, let the idea rest for a while, and then ask for inner guidance to help us make decisions.
- When you’re ready, make a decision (and then see how it feels) – you can always pretend to make one decision for the day (and then see how it feels) – and then follow your inner wisdom. But once you’ve made your decision, go for it. To grow and expand, we must take courageous actions, and revise as necessary as we continue on our paths.
If you’re not clear on your values yet, I encourage you to take a couple of quiet hours to figure out what is most important to you in your life. Make a list of the top ten values you hold in your life currently. Write them somewhere you can refer back to – when you’re in the midst of making big decisions. Your values can be your guideposts.
And when you’re not sure, give yourself time to step away from a decision. Meditate. Pray. Go on walks. Move your body in ways that make you feel healthy and alive and wise. Trust your intuition, matched with your logic.
I’ll keep you posted on how life progresses on my end. I’m so excited for the new adventures of co-habitating with my boyfriend (and his two cool kiddos). I’m looking forward to learning and growing, and will share with you my lessons along the way.